The Start Of Everything New

Hello lovelies!

Well what can I say - I have a clean slate at the moment. Everything is pure and positive and finally on the right track. University starts soon, I have a new job that is actually at the university as well and I am moving out of home (kind of). 

First off - university. I’ve kind of touched on this in my last post but I thought I’d dive into more depth of what I’ll be doing etc now. I will be doing what is called a conjoint degree - basically studying for two degrees at the same time. My main degree will be a bachelor in Law (LLB) and bachelor of Arts (BA) First year law I will be studying intro to legal system, case law and statute law. As for the BA, the subjects I’m taking are international relations, criminology and theatre. Musical theatre was a big part of my life when I was little so getting back to even a taste of that will be magical. My timetable is full on and I will be extremely tired, especially with endo, but I am so motivated to just make it happen since I have waited so long for it and worked so hard to get where I am now.

To make university even more exciting and getting me on the edge of my seat in terms of wanting to start straight away is I obtained a job at a bar/cafe inside the university called The Hunter Lounge. Working and studying in the same place - how good is that?? Everything has fallen into place all at the same time and I go to bed at night so happy knowing everything is finally working out the way I had always hoped it would.

Thirdly! I am (not officially) moving out of home! On my days of study I will be staying closer to the university and coming home on the weekends. Just a stepping stone until I flat with fellow minded people from uni. It’s a step in the right direction and gaining some of my own independence as well as being in a new environment and being around a quiet place (which is always a bonus for study). Not to mention the fact one of my neighbours is a lawyer - who practices the same types of law that I want to. 

In terms of endo - the pain has been dying down a little and not being so prominent every day. The only negative thing that has happened with endo recently is the return of bleeding during intercourse. Now, it went away for a while so I was happy in the knowledge that it wasn’t going to happen again but then it decided to make itself known. Which to say in the least was a tad embarrassing so I went to doctor google as well as some endo sisters and everything that I am doing in terms of birth control and pain relief for endo is a contributor to mid-sex bleeding. Ahh, the joys. 

That’s all from me for now!

Lots of love,

Brie xx

A Quick Rant

Hello lovelies,

I haven't had much time the past week to write anything substantial about endometriosis - having to deal with a collection of things such as study, a death in the family and still getting through the emotional rollercoaster of a break up as well as the side of endo pain has been quite overwhelming to say the least. So take this blog post as a quick update on how everything has been going for me recently.

1. I had my first cervical smear last Friday, and the nurse was so fantastic and explained to me how the process works and the possible outcomes of the test (and thank God it came back normal). She had read over all my notes and commented on her sympathy for all women with endometriosis which was actually really nice to hear and nearly made me tear up. Now for the gruesome and extremely personal side of this and what my experience was like with my first smear. I have to say that I was extremely intrigued by the 'broom' that was used by the nurse. It seemed like the brushes of the 'broom' were really soft and kind of like the silicone baking brush that you use to smother butter over the top of pastry with. Since I am sexually active I had to get it done whilst I am 20, otherwise it would have been 25 I believe. Do correct me if I am wrong because I am in no way 100% on that. The speculum used to open my cervix was normal like all the other ones I've seen over all my gynaecologist visits in the past. Once the speculum was in place it felt like a huge gust of wind was going up my... yea you get the mental image... sorry about that... it was time to get the broom up in there. And it was painful, extremely painful. It felt like I was having sex all over again but without the emotional and obvious pleasure side of things. The cramping and jabbing feeling that vibrated all over my pelvis was terror. There was also blood resulting from this which was also what I had sometimes after sex. The nurse said it happened as soon as the 'broom' touched my cervix. Thanks endo, you're the bees knees sometimes. The positive out of that was that I have no trace of cancerous cells or HPV and anything along those lines. I am all squeaky clean, seems like my room is not the only thing that is a result of my OCD. Anyway, for the rest of the night I was crampy and cuddled up with my heat pack and my cat. And maybe some cake. But I'm willing to overlook that concept of my night for emotional stability reasons.

2. My brain is fried. Being in an accelerated course for law is causing my head to hurt quite often. I am studying what others have over the time of 9 months, in only 3. And it is the hardest thing I have ever studied. Ever. It makes me feel like I belong back at college. It's dawning on me that between now and October, when my exams are, I will be in educational, mental turmoil. And then after the exams I will most likely collapse and find somewhere sunny to lay down and have a platter of cinnamon dusted mini doughnuts next to me to lazily reach out and grab whenever my taste buds scream for them. Looks like my summer has been sorted. I felt like a smart ass doing NCEA... law makes me feel like my brain is the size of Homer Simpsons'. *bangs head repeatedly on desk* pray for me people, I'm going to need it.

3. I have a fun ass night coming my way. Now I know it's not for everyone, but karaoke to me is like a haven that needs to be visited extremely often. And I have not done it for over a year so it its going to be epic! I have some portable heat pads that I can stick to my belly and it hides under my clothes (thank you Libra, I love you so much) so I can have a good time without worrying too much about pain. Like, can life get any better right now??

Thats all for now! 

Love Brie xx

A Brief History

Bonjour! And welcome to my new blog. My name is Brodie Joyce (but you can call me Brie) and I was born in the land down under (aka Australia) but moved back to New Zealand with my mother to be with my kiwi family when I was one year old. And little to my knowledge, and my mothers, my future was going to be a roller coaster - a constant up and down with health issues. The first twelve years of my life were as normal as any other twelve year old girls who I went to school with. I had a few fainting episodes at school but it was looked at as a mental health issue which completely confused myself and my parents. Fast forward a year or so, the pelvic and abdomen pains arrived, even before my period had started - but I suppose, my body was preparing itself to begin my menstrual cycle. And when my first period did arrive, it wasn't the best experience of my life, that's for sure. I got it during the night while I was asleep, and woke up in the morning feeling a little bit sick. Once I noticed there was blood in my sheets, a huge wave of nausea came over me to the point I was dry reaching over the toilet. It was not from the sight of blood as I'm completely fine with that. My parents told me that was normal when you get your first period, however now that I know what illness I have, it was far from normal. 

Once I had started getting my period every month, the intense pain started. I went through ultrasound after ultrasound, hospital visits and emotional turmoil. And the confusing thing was, the pain wasn't prominent just at 'that time of the month', it was consistent every week of the month. Being told by doctors and specialists that it was normal and just one of those things, and the pain can be controlled by birth control (the pill). It took a while to find the right type of birth control, around a year. One type gave me morning sickness, another made no difference what so ever. 

To make a long story short - my GP ordered another ultrasound, but this one was different from all the others that I had. The radiologist actually wanted to find out what was wrong and did an internal scan. That is when she found something. A dermoid cyst on my left ovary. It seemed like a negative thing at the time, but endometriosis was found during the surgical removal of the cyst as well as having the Mirena inserted. When I got told by the surgeon I have endometriosis, I had no idea what it was at the time and to be honest, it wasn't explained to me in the detail in which I deserved. So it was up to me to do my own research.  I found out endometriosis is a chronic illness, that there is no cure and no sure explanation as to how it has come about and what causes it. Which did break my heart. The risk of infertility, more surgeries in the future was crushing. Knowing that having this illness will create issues in my future for finding a husband and life partner. I had a boyfriend at the time when all of this happened, but unfortunately we are not together anymore. Endo did make it difficult on the both of us, although he didn't know or was aware of the half of it. One thing that needs to be important to a person with any chronic illness is this; respect. Never take anything less than that from your significant other.

I am making changes in my life that are necessary in order for me to live a normal life as much as I possibly can. Dietary changes and positive thinking. I constantly have a heat pack on my pelvis when Im at home, and am on multiple pain killers. Possibly in the process of having yet another surgery but I'm a very lucky lady. I have so much support in my life from family and friends, I'm so grateful for what I have. I have the opportunity to study, to live, to love, to have fun. In comparison to other ladies, my endometriosis is light. And that, my dear friends, is a blessing for myself. And I wish that I could help every woman with endometriosis.

This is just a light overview of my experiences as an introduction to this blog. My intention is not to complain or anything in that sense. It is to educate others on this illness, this one that is near the top of the most painful chronic illness list. If I'm correct, it's the third one. I am going to share what my life is like, the struggles that I go through and what every day is like for a person going through something like this.

So if you'd like, check back in every now and then to see my new posts. 

Lots of love,

Brie xx